Today I had a physical. I hate physicals! The older you get the more places they seem to feel they need to prod, poke, and stick things. (Uh hum!) But this one was different - this was my "Adoption Physical". 3 months ago I had no idea that in order to even qualify for an adoption home study, every person in your home has to be examined. Even the dog! (We don't have any pets right now, so we got to skip that part.) Driving there this morning was a real twist of emotions and thoughts. The main thing that kept running through my head was: What if I don't pass? Crazy, I know. But this physical wasn't just for me, so that I could walk out and know that I'm moderately healthy and in decent shape - this was to QUALIFY to be a parent. Which is sort of weird. I thought I was already a parent. Right? In fact, many of my friends who I've shared this with have expressed to me (without reservation) how ridiculous it is that "you have to go through all of this" to make the grade or meet the standard. But if I'm being honest - at this point - I don't mind it a bit.
No, I don't like going to the doctor. Especially when I'm not sick! But I also thought Algebra was a completely unnecessary part of my sophomore year in college. I hated it. But it was part of a process that actually WAS necessary for me to see God's intended purpose for me to come to fruition: graduate. And while I'm not sure that the Lord is waiting on pins and needles to find out the results of my urinalysis, if this is a necessary part of the journey that gets me one step closer to that child the Lord has planned to be part of our family, then bring it on!
There are going to be things you have to do in life - tests you have to take, side roads you have to go down, unexpected days you have to be on your back on the sofa - that, whether you like it or not, are part of the journey. You can be annoyed by them - hacked off, feeling like you're entitled to a FREE PASS - and buy into the lie that you're "wasting your time" when you should be hurrying on down the road. Or...you can keep your eyes on the calling and the mission and the goal...and breathe every moment of it in knowing that in just a little while, it will all make sense. It will all be worth it. Every bit of it! Every poke and prod, every 20-page detailed questionnaire, all the waiting, wondering, and praying. It will all be worth.
Stay focused. Enjoy and savor the moments. Even the ones that may not feel necessary. One day...they'll make sense.
1 comment:
Your already a great father :)
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