January 25, 2010

Avoiding Adultery: Making Much of Your Marriage!

Adultery. Have you ever noticed it's just the word "Adult" with "ery" on the end? Sorta weird, huh? The word just screams images of sneaky, creepy, Do Not Disturb signs and older women in fishnet hose. Sorry. But if you grew up with Mrs. Robinson stamped in your mind, it's unavoidable. Yesterday I had the distinct - and uncomfortably awkward - privilege of preaching against this moral disease that has infected so many people in our culture. Here are some of my thoughts.

The Journal of Psychology and Christianity reported that "Up to 65% of husbands and 55% of wives will commit adultery by the age of 40". Did you absorb that stat? Yet, yesterday I asked for a show of hands: "Who is planning on committing adultery?" Not one hand. No one! (Thank God! I hadn't prepared myself for how to handle that one.) What this exposes is pretty cut and dry and simple: almost NO ONE who commits adultery is ever "planning" on it. The greater problem is, no one has a plan to AVOID falling on their face in this area. If you need help with this plan, take some time and listen to the message from yesterday: www.thebrookchurch.com/pages/podcasts.html

I challenged our men with this question: Have you stopped dating your wife? Sadly, many men - after several years of getting seriously comfortable co-existing - begin to love their chair and remote and SportsCenter more than their wife. I know, it sounds bad when I write it. That's because it IS bad! It's criminal. But it's FACT. Husbands have to understand that the young lady they chased and pursued still wants to be pursued. (Regardless of what they tell you - they want you to still want them!) This exhortation was warmly welcomed by the ladies, of course. But it was followed with this encouragement to the wives present: If you want your husbands to chase & pursue you, give them a reason! If everyday is "cotton pajamas and house shoes" day, things need to change! Ladies need to remember that one reason your husband was attracted to you is because he was ATTRACTED to you! You were trying and working hard to attract him and reel him in. So why would you start trying to REPEL him now? This is a 2-way street. This is NOT 50-50 - this is 100-100. This is marriage! It is 2 people working to grow and serve each other and give each other countless reasons to say, "I would never do anything to break this commitment or to crush this person's heart." It is willingly emptying yourself and putting someone else first. And THIS is the essence of what it means to be an "Adult". And in case we're not all connecting the dots, ADULTERY has NO place in that mix. Period. It is a KILLER! Adultery makes an adult a whole lot less of an adult. Sorta weird, huh?

Has your life been affected by adultery? Has it personally hit home?
I pray that the horrifying statistic I shared with you earlier begins to plummet as the people of God go to war for the sake of their marriages.

Go Deeper:
Proverbs 5
Matthew 5:27-29

1 Corinthians 7

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